DFC #156

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

I don't care if they sag now - I showed you mine, now you show me yours!Wally

But mom, the teacher said Wednesday's are clothing optional.VitaminTom

Not knowing what Thel was tripping on at the time, and whether or not she really did have Bil's gun, Jeffy's only option to prove that he wasn't that little bath hating shit Calvin, was to show that he hadn't been maimed by a large predatory feline. phonsux

Drowning, urine, public nudity, pedophilia...just the same old same old...I'm bored...What do you say we just take an innocent bath together and play with my tugboat?... What is that look? What did I say this time? Huh? What?Crusty Booger

Whadda you mean take it out? But, Mom! Penial piercings are the 'in' thing. All the kids at the daycare center have them! You don't want to me to an social outcast, do you?Sticky

We were playing McHale's Navy goes to the nudist colony. I'm Ensign Parker, and I lost my cloths, and Gruber is looking for them. You're not buying this, are you?Bil Keane - PT 73

Hey, so I'm a Continental kinda guy. Just gimme one good reason why I can't use Bil's Water-Pik for a bidet?Ratsass

Gowan now, try and tell me that being uncircumsized doesn't make me look bigger!RBByrnes

Hey! You have the same expression our gym teacher Mr. Hutchinson gets when he comes into our shower room at school!RBByrnes

Well at least I only do this when I'm in the bathroom, Mrs. Answer-the-Door-in-the-Nude Keane.Tazabby

but Father Doug said it was a way of God showing his love for me!sewer urchin

"Dammit...I dont wanna hear any excuse about your 'heavy flow' this month! I just wish you woulda mopped up this mess before I'd stepped in it!neek

"I saw one on an elephant once, but I'll be damned if this thing picks up peanuts."fred.

OK, there you go, 50 pushups. Now can I have my clothes?Kevin

Ok bitch... you saw the goods. Now, what about that free digital camera?clotty

Considering the family gene pool, I decided that a vascectomy was the only answer...Verneaux


Jeffy never stood a chance. Without his clothes, he had no protection from Thel's vicious rat-tailing.Thomas Wilde

Today we learned to count to eleven.Jadie

Er, yes... I AM feelin' kinda cheecky today! How'd ya guess?Doc Evil

Why did you just lock the bathroom door, Mommy? ... Mommy?Neal P. Ripcrab

Hello, Mrs. Robinson!Tazabby

Whenever Thel's kids made her nervous, she would picture them with no clothes on.alanon

Sorry, Mom, that old hairdo just doesn't spark the same reaction.Gen. Sedgwick

C'mon, Mom, I've done 15 takes already. You want to keep shooting, I'll need a fluffer.Charlie Steinhice

Hey, I'm four years old. How big do you expect it to be?Anastasia

What? No strip search? But I've been a very bad boy. I have something bad on me right now. Very naughty indeed. Please?Greg J

As Thel drooled over her son's nude body, a swirling vortex opened up and sucked her down into a hell set especially aside for pedophillic whores.Tazabby

...so the Scotsman says, "I didna know you could also get wool from them!" Get it? Get it? Man, tough room.Sir Psycho Sexy

...and it's the way god meant us to be! now if you'll exuse me, i'm going to school.dogvomit

Shower scenes, shower scenes, shower scenes. Thats all we ever do anymore, and I'm fucking tired of it!Yakko

Guess which hand? The one without the anal probe THAT'S WHICH HAND!ChoppingBlock

Jezzus Mom! One more bon-bon and you'll fall right through the floor! For Crissakes, you're already buckling it!!!Puckman

I told you not to sneak up on me before I get into the shower. At least I was on linoleum this time!!!Puckman

It may not be much, but I'm the only man around here sober enough to get it up, so where else are you gonna go?Schickelgruber

I'm sorry you're underwhelmed, but there is this little phenomenon called shrinkage.ferret

His agent having scored a major coup, Jeffy practices for his guest appearance on NYPD Blue.ferret

Look, Mrs. Spock, I don't know how many ways I can say it: your husband and my daddy are NOT involved in some sort of interspecies, interplanetary homo-lovefest. Now get your ass off our transporter pad and let me take my fuckin' bath!The 4-Star Pope

"For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come, when we have shuffled off this mortal coil." I dunno, Thel. Outside of Bil and Uncle Roy, do you really think there's a market for "Nude, Pedophile Hamlet"?The 4-Star Pope

Jeffy knew the game was up. Only one more place to look in the strip search, and she'd find the smack.TBone

"Hey... Pull my..., uh, never mind."TBone

I hope you'll enjoy this next number. Aaaa-hem. "In days of old a glimpse of stocking was looked on as something shocking, now heaven knows, anything goes!....The 4-Star Pope

Explain again why drawing my butt is wholesome family fare, but photographing it is child abuse?Horselover Fat

Why can't I turn around? America needs to be educated about genital warts.Horselover Fat

You chicks are all the same. You try to look non-plussed, when in reality, every cell in your body is a-quiver!Vice Pope Doug

Your Mystic Circle of Protection may have protected you from my Urine Stream of Great Force, but you'll have to step outof there eventually! And then, then we shall see who is the true master of wizardry!the infamous tms

A once-wholesome comic strip is irrevocably altered when Bob Guccione gets his hands on it in post-production.Sir Psycho Sexy

Hey, I'm sorry...You try drinking three huge glasses of KoolAid and then listen to the tub fill up.Deej

We're done for. That crotch shadow will surely be mistaken for pubic hair, the bathmat has no dimensions, I'm naked in a puddle of my own urine, and the family's second nostril is on the doorknob. Those DFC folks will have us for lunch!anon

Be honest, Mom. Are guys gonna make fun of me in the locker room for having a weenie that's smaller than my "outie" belly button?Sir Psycho Sexy

...to sum up: Lowering the prime rate by a mere two tenths of a percent will very likely, given current leading indicators, result in a point five percent decrease in unemployment, while at the same time averting inflationary pressures and keeping the dollar sufficiently soft in the critical European and East Asian markets! Oh, I give up. You'll never take my argument seriously until I put some clothes on.Sir Psycho Sexy

"Fiiiiiigaro! Figaro, Figaro, Figaro!"Ravecavy

Honest, it was THIS LONG a minute ago.Zapper

"...and so then I says...Mom? Mom? A little eye contact please..."Psychobear

Last thing I remember is Dad saying "here try a sip of this", then i wake up naked in a pool of my own vomit.anon

While Jeffy's impersonation of Jolson was near perfect, his inability to hold his water while singing Swanee nipped his stage career in the bud.Kittenhead

Does this panel really need a vulgar caption to qualify for the title of dysfunctional?Turtle

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