DFC #224

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

The melonhead mother ship is here!Schmuck

"... an' it sounds like they're playin' Ride of the Valkyries!"Namgubed the Merry Elf

"Oh NO! It's Thor vs. Ororo!!" -- Yes, there was big trouble in Comicland.Namgubed the Merry Elf

Jeffy desperately tries to stop the scenery rushing in to fill the vacuum of their stark, white home.marty gray

HELP! Real life's at the door, and it's mad as hell!Magus

In a scence cut from the original, Kubrik had a young Dave inside the monolith trying to force a door closed to balance out Dave's forcing the door open on Discovery symbolizing the need to sometimes keep knowledge from ourselves....John Buchner

PLEASE! No! Don't look out there! WE MUST MAINTAIN THE FANTASY!Daniel Lanker

Cargo hold depressurizing... must... shut... airlock... [From Keane's new adventure strip, Mir Mortals]Gen. Sedgwick

Uh, Bil? It might be easier to hold this door closed if it had, like, hinges?Polaris

Jeffy's acid began to kick in. Oh no! It was the dreade Oz trip. He hated those shoes. They were so damn red. They burned his eyes. But there was nothing he could do.anon

Mom! Bil drew another '3 Tenors' concert on the lawn again! Stop them before Pavoratti gets his second wind!bobo

Help! It's Perot's Giant Sucking Noise!!zazu

We're not in Kansas anymore. But If I remember right the Munchkins are short, elbowless and hypno-haired just like me!Schmo

"Good Lord! Marcel Marceau's been possessed ... an he's walkin' against the wind!!"Namgubed the Merry Elf

...Although it's difficult to believe, Just like The Wizard of Oz the coincedences between the two can be startling. Here for example is the exact moment on the album when Roger Waters begins singing "So Welcome... Welcome.. Welcome... to Thel Keane" - excerpt from Rolling Stone article "Spin the Dumb Circle - an alternate soundtrack for The Family Circus"Delsyn

Tornado's coming! Brilliant idea to move in next to a trailer park Dad.Anastasia

"It's some bitch named Mariah, she's crying Mary, getting up beneath Bette Midler's wings, aw ferchrissakes, help me out with these friggin' wind jokes here!"tv's Spatch

Jeffy had been in danger before, but this time was different. This time, even the tadpoles that lived in his hair knew it was time to flee. Owell

Nature abhorrs a Jeffy.Westur the Unspeakable


"Seconds later, Jeffey was sucked into the Twister, believing to the last that Dad and Billy actually were running into the basement for planks to bar the door.-- from 25 Years in Pampers: The Memoirs of J.P. KeaneHideo Spanner

Fuck! Once this wind gets into my pants cuffs, I'm done for!Riff

"Bil loved the power he wielded over us. He'd coop us up in featureless white rooms for months on end. Then he'd offer us the promise of an outdoor vingette and we'd serve his every sick whim. But on the appointed day, he would gleefully add a tornado bearing down on the yard and drive us out into it." Jeffery Keane, Children of a Drunken GodBlue Gargantua

Hurry damn it! Help me close this door. I just chased that bastard grandpa ghost out the fucking door!Schmuck

The big bad wolf is here again!Schmuck

Mommy, Daddy! The Difficult Zone is here, and it's PISSED!Westur the Unspeakable

How the fuck did I manage to get this thing open in the first place? I can't reach the top of my own head, let alone the friggin' doorknob!Westur the Unspeakable

I dunno!!!! Billy an' I were just defilin' a Native American burial ground, an' this shit started!!Vice Pope Doug

Marmaduke's got the farts. Bad.Vice Pope Doug

Someone remind me never to use my hypnohair to make the daughter of the northwind take off her pantiesHugh Jass

Shortly after this photo was taken, the immense force of the tornado slammed the door open, squashing little Jeffy like a bug against the wall. Ah, that was a good day. Circus of the Damned: Growing Up Keane, by Patrick J. KeanePodbeing

Jeffy holds his own against a Tsunami of incoming DFC flatulence jokes.Toothpick vic

TV GUIDE LISTING FOR 8/1/97: HBO presents "Twister 2": In this exciting sequel to 1996's suprise hit, the F-5 twister is back to wreak havoc supernaturally, when it becomes attracted to a young boy's hypnotic hair in Anytown, USA. Jeffy Keane and Don Knotts star. TV-MAToothpick Vic

Mom! The Rapture's starting! The angels will be here any second! HIDE THE DRUGS! HIDE THE DRUGS!Timmy's Flat Rotting Colon

...mayonniase. Next slide please. Exhibit 2347A, Child used as door stop. Next slide please. Exhibit 2347B...BretttMaverick

HHHEEELLLPPP!!! It's reality at the door again! Can't....keep...it...out....Dave

"Thanks a lot you guys! That 'Ellie Patterson' reference really cheesed God off!"DieBilDie

Who let Dolly eat Mexican again?Heath

Aw, Hell... Elmer Fudd's got totally 'faced and broke out his ' Spear & Magic Helmet '!Doc Evil

By the itching of my stumps, I'd look wicked in some pumps...--wait, that came out wrong!Trevita

"Help! The Stupid Zone is trying to suck me in with a "Who farted?" caption!"phonsux

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