DFC #230

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

It's an interesting gimmick, but I just don't think Ouija Soup will sell in the southern states.alanon

Chinese alphabet soup? You Can't cram their entire alphabet inta ONE can, fer chrissakes!Doc Evil

Mommy! Dolly's taking all the swastikas!Ron Martin

This "Wheel of Fortune" soup reminds me a lot of Pat Sajak; white, bland, and slightly nauseating.bobo

This DFC brought to you by 40-O's, the malt liquor cereal.Mafis

This is what you do with the rejected captions? Heath

14, 15, 16. Sixteen rat poison pellets. Remember the days when they at least tried to be subtle?alanon

While Billy began his endless complaints about the food, Dolly began her lesbian fantasy about Zena and Gabrielle.JohnBoy

Check it out! Th' Z is ACTUALLY pulling Dolly's finger!Doc Evil

No matter what I try to spell, I keep fishing out these red asterisks...Gen. Sedgwick

We figure if we can spell out "Soylent Green" the DFC will have to remove this one, and then maybe we can have one meal in peace.worth a shot

"Nope, no matter how you pull'em out, our cereal just keeps spelling 'FAILURE.'"The Interrupting Cow

We raced around the house for thirty minutes for THIS shit?Gen. Sedgwick

Thanks a lot Mom. What did you save, maybe five cents, by getting Cyrillic alphabet soup?Schickelgruber

Subliminal advertising hits the Family Circus: the Spaggetios spell, "Buy Stay-Free Maxis with Wings".Royal Canadian Mounted Yaksman

I'm not saying I'm not ungrateful you got us something for our calcium deficiency, I'm just saying it's obviously too late when our teeth start falling out in soggy cereal.Pastor of Muppets

Hey Mom, they said at school we should be able to recongize these shapes by now, and even form something called "words".I love the public school system

We'd better get the real tooth fairy this time and not a wasted Bil in his skivies and a pink tutu barfing under our pillows.Tazabby

Just one more "t" and I'll finally get that suicide note done.Tazabby

If you pretend the letters like the ones on Sesame Street--living beings with feelings, thoughts and dreams--then this stuff is a hell of a lot funner to eat.Kevin

Unfortunately for Billy, he caught Dolly's magic rune in the corner of his eye and turned to stone.Tazabby

Screw the "starving kids in China" bit. Do they ever feel guilty when we have to go weeks at a time with nothing but wilted lettuce and mayonnaise?Tazabby

While Billy ranted on, Dolly sank into a mystic reverie as her hand, steadily guided by unseen forces, pressed each letter into place: "YTLIUG SI .J.O"...what were the spirits trying to say?anon

Double, double, toil and trouble, Cheerios burn and skim milk bubbles.ColBleep

"The noodles are fun to play with, but I like the beaks the best!"Mutantdog

"Nice try, mom! Fortunately, we're on such sugar highs any educational benefits this cereal might have are wasted! Hey, Dolly, here's to being 30-year-old illiterate melon-heads!"Rappin' Rickey V.

How come Spinnwebe will only let us submit our own captions this way?Mister Sinister

I'm going to keep this Y as a symbol of all the questions I have. Such as why didn't you and Dad ever use birth control?Anastasia

Hey, Mommy! We won a free trip to the Impossible Zone with these Barfy-O's!The Outsider

Billy blathered on about meaningless inanities, unaware that his Miniature Octopus Soup had turned on him and was even now going for the jugular.The Outsider

Hey, Mommy -- I found the rat's wishbone! What do you think I should wish for?Paul Roub

I'm not sure I'll be able to get used to AlphEbonics Cereal.Jinx

See this letter? This is what I ask every day of my goddamn miserable life!Jinx

How does Campbell's expect us to spell "Der Fuhrer" without a damn umlaut?Agent Todd

These Kellogg's Strontium Bits are great, Mommy! Another tooth came out for the Tooth Fairy!marty gray

"Mom, Dolly's using a booger to spell 'Boogie Man', is that a legal move?"Lee Harvey

"The soup seems to be telling me that I should save the souls of the unbelieving with the righteous and holy baptism of gasoline and blood, but somebody keeps eating my 'D's'." Mr. Moody

Will you please get me the pipe Mommy? This roach is too short to light.anon

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