DFC #243

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

I see the end of the millennium. I see riots, fires, earthquakes. I see that I will never get out of this damn circleliving a lie

The hills are alive -- and they're eating children ... (ahhh-hh-hh-hhh!)Namgubed the Merry Elf

As Dolly saw the combine coming closer, she now knew why her mother had warned her to stay out of the melon patch at harvest time.alanon

Sensing a predator's approach, the Prairie Dolly lets out a shrill whistle as a warning to the other members of the colony before disappearing into her own burrow.alanon

As well as providing entertainment on Bil's hunting trips, Dolly was also his best pointer.Duckfoot

A nigthmarish scene from the original version of Kafka's "Metamorphosis," in which the protagonist turns not into an insect but into a member of the Keane family. Abandoned by the author, who described it as "Just too fucking bleak."Jizmo the Wonder Horse

Damn it! Six weeks of tunneling to freedom and I resurface in another single panel cartoon. What is this place? Who are those two naked six year olds holding hands... Holy shit! I'm in Love Is...anon

As Dolly rose from the grave, one thought raced through Billy's mind: the only real way to get rid of a toon is with... ink remover!the Artist Formerly Known as the Prince of Darkness

Dolly stared over the hill at the "normal" world below her, staring in wonder at families where well-fed children were not cringing in fear of their drugged out parents. An image that would she would remember for the rest of her tortured life as the others pulled her back down the hill.Tazabby

Dolly stared in horror at the crudely made graves. It looked like that Susie had had her revenge on Calvin and Hobbes after all.Tazabby

Bil Keane's opus Five Seconds from Vomit didn't achieve the critical acclaim he had hoped for, but it did sell for $100,000 to Michael Jacksonwho said that?

munch...munch...munch... * BLEAH! * When is Bil gonna fix th' damn mower?Doc Evil

Dolly looked up at the oncoming Jeffy, and froze. One thought ran through her mind: "If he keeps this up, he'll get put in the Difficult Zone...but first I have to survive..."Thomas Wilde

Why do all the flowers on Grandpa's grave die so quickly?Anastasia

sigh Why do flowers get to die, but not me?Anastasia

Dang, another 4 weeks of winter. Dolly saw her shadow again.Lee Harvey

Come back, you pansy! I'll bite your legs off!Namgubed the Merry Elf

Most critics agree: "Dolly's World", from Wyeth's notorious 'watermelon-head' period, is quite affecting and disturbing, but for the wrong reasons.Opti!

Shit! The DEA guys found our crop again! We'll be lucky to get a joint from what's left!PD Lathe

"Daddy's limp penis, blah, blah, blah..... symbol of my wilting femininity, yada yada yada........."a.holter

Dolly topped the ridge and saw a scene of utter horror. The house, the yard, the melonheaded occupants. She'd been traveling in a circle!DieBilDie

MY GAWD....it was DOLLY on the grassy knoll!Waldo

Dolly re-enacts the final scene of All Quiet On The Western Front.Butterfly Touch

The hills are alive... ahhh fuck it, Bil, the Nazis have better uniformsRadio Show

Dolly pleaded in vain as the family wagon drove away. Soon, she'd understand why it was called Death Valley. Radio Show

Hmmm...drooping, depressed, wilting...it's a Keane!agm

While Dolly stumbles upon a flower symbolizing her rapidly wilting life, Jeffy silently waited 200 yards away, the sensor of his semi-automatic rifle trained squarely on Dolly's heart. "This'll teach 'em not to leave me out of these panels anymore!" thought Jeffy as he pulled the trigger...Mr. Ben

"Look, mom!" exclaimed Dolly. "It's the wilted flower I was telling you about. Perfect analogy for your descent from beauty and hope into the washed out cum-cuzzling gutter slut shell of a woman you are now, eh?"Skywise

Where will you be when your laxitive kicks in?bobo

Oh, no! Quickgrass!Jenn Dolari

The original version of Lyndon Baines Johnson's memorable campaign ad backfired, when no one seemed to give a damn when the pictured nuclear bomb destroyed Dolly.Jenn Dolari

"Look, Daddy! This flower is almost as dead as your career!"Reed Spacer

DFC Photo album; Dolly doing her duty as the scarecrow in the hemp field.Terminus

Dolly looked up and froze in terror. Jeffy had the riding mower, and he was out to reclaim his stardom.anon

Back to the DFC Archive index