DFC #259

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

"...all of the controversy over female circumcision allowed us to castrate the boy, and thus preserve his angelic voice, with relatively little uproar" -Venice Opera "Annual Report 1997"Maestro War Gerbil

Okay, so Daddy thinks coat hangers are of the devil because they're sometimes used to perform abortions. Can't I at least have a row of pegs or something?alateen

Would someone please call the chiropractor?Anastasia

* OW! * Dammit! my ' Prince Albert ' is caught * YEEEEOW! * in my zipper AGAIN! * Arg! *Doc Evil

...jump back make me wanna kiss myself...R.J.M.

This IS art, dammit! I'll get that NEA grant, you'll see!!Dan Jones

I'm Fartman! *poot*anon

If Billy was going to win the Human Masthead Finals, he was going to have to practice extra hard.Shifter

"Awright! Which one of you bastards sewed the legs of my pants together?!?"Wyvern

Spontaneous telekinetic outbursts are a bitch on laundry, aren't they?Thomas Wilde

"Riiiiiiiicolaaaaa!!!"Jamey "Ten bucks says this is an impossilbe zone by cartoon #275" Powell

"Okay, Mom, no piece of clothing is touching any other. Now will you take the tinfoil off your head and come down from the coffee table?"Randall

The Falcons rule! D'you hear me? They RULE!!Namgubed the Merry Elf

"Dolly! Come quick! Jeffy just spontanteously exploded! This is so damn cool!"Shifter

The Juice is loose! The Juice is loose! Xian, the boy with the monkey heart

That deck is NOT marked! Now come back here an' finish the strip poker game!Namgubed the Merry Elf

Damn! My blow's gone, my room looks like a scene from Risky Business, and 'Not Me' is stuck to the wall in my football jersey! What the hell goes on here?!?Paul "Weekend at Jeffy's" Reed

Thel's favorite practical joke to play on Billy was to lay his clothes out all over his room, tie his hands behind his back, and watch him try to get dressed using only his teeth.agm

Go on now, go! Walk out that door! I will survive! I... I'll survive, goddamn you. *sob*Tangent

"Dry heaves" - a new Family Circus commemorative collector's plate - Order yours now from the Franklin Mint!Westur the Unspeakable

Dad, you drew me a whole room full of shirts and no pants! What am I supposed to pack for the NAMBLA convention? Hey, wait a minute...garden weasel

Billy Skywalker relaxed, letting the clothes fall where they may. His powers were growing stronger each day. Soon, he would be able to take on Bil Vader and Emperor Roy....but first, another dose of acid. Obi-Wan Thel had told him how the acid increased his powers. Perhaps, soon, he would be able to fly.....Sinister

Here depicted, the Japanese mirror site of this DFC cartoon, where pants have been painted on his lower torso, the Dildinator 2000 has been retouched from his grip, and Bil is nowhere to be seen...Wally Gator

MOM-MEE! You promised you'd stop entertaining my boy scout troup when I'm not home.Anastasia

Please mom???? I'm telling you my room's screaming to be remodeled.. I saw this absolutely DARLING ensemble in Filene's..And I look at these walls and I just think lilac!!!Al

Wow, #32--that's Karl Malone's jersey! ...Mom really IS doing the Mailman!Froot Lupus

With Thel driving the porcelain bus again, it would be quite a while before Billy could go to the bathroom. As he stood there writhing in agony, he gasped as the stress make a little part of him break down and he had a hallucination of clean laundry.Dr. Schmuck

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