DFC #45

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

Yeah, you're right, the chicks do like that. They like it a lot. But they don't expect you to swallow.ick

Quit being so literal. Next time someone says "Eat me", just smile and walk away. Okay?Kurt L.

Jeffy, you've gotta stop eating your nipples.aaron

I can STILL hear that damn hamster!anon

Y'know, maybe it's a bad idea if I pull this plug -- you might just go whizzin' everywhere, just like a balloon.anon

Whoa! Daddy must've really nailed your ass HARD to get your belly button to stick out like that!anon

"Almost done.. there. I never pierced a navel before, but since you have no nipples to pierce, well..."Mister Sinister

All right, you've got her shirt off, now you start listening to her stomach, and you're all intense like you're hearin' somethin' really fascinating, and you start moving it lower, and then you start making a big deal over how the top of her pants are in the way . . . all right, you with me so far, Jeffy?Pete B.

Uh, Jeffy? Is it all right if I start calling you "Sumo"?Magus

I don't care if it was a dare, you shouldnt've ate that bullet...KissMyAsp

Actually, I'm more concerned about your lack of mouth than about your lack of nipples.Mr. Groovy

How'd you get so damn chubby without a mouth, Jeffy? Oh, sorry. I forgot. You can't answer me, can you.zed

OK, sounds like my cock ring is passing through your lower intestine now. You should be fine within 24 hours.Paul Roub

You can hear those tapeworms justa wigglin' round.anon

Hey Jeffy, what the fuck? I thought you hated rap!Jeffrey L. Nelson

Dolly, when this kid comes out, he's gonna take a look at that butch haircut of yours and think his momma's some kind of lesbo or something!Kittycat

Man, Jeffy, that "Abs of Steel" video really DOES work!Toade

Yup, there's a party goin' in in your tummy, and Captain Jack Daniels is the guest of honor!Riff

Jeffy, once we get this colostomy done, your wiping days are over!Coyote

I'm sorry, Jeffy. Looks like we're gonna hafta amputate the other arm, too.Riff

Wow! Radio Moscow doesn't come in THIS clear on the Grundig!Bill Fortier

Lessee ... two turns right to 53, one turn left to 14, right to -- aw, damn! Mommy, are you sure you don't remember Jeffy's combination?ik

Your liver is fucked. I told you to lay off the sauce.Troll Ticket

No offense Jeffy, but playin' "gynecological exam" is usually a lot more fun with Dolly.Greg J

Yup - pregnant but no nipples. Dude, you're in a world of hurt!BK

Belly button's fine. Now lets check your prostatezazu

Ha! Just five more minutes of the liposuction transfer, and my head will once again be larger than Dolly's!Capt. phealy

...and our next exam will require you to cough. Can you cough, Jeffy?anon

I know you don't have any, but if you check out the nipple server, I think you'll get a pretty good idea of what they look like. The left one anyway.Hugh Jass

"Yep, he's still alive alright! I can hear him movin' around."Blake

Is this where your stomach hurts? I can't find anything wrong...it must have been all those damned 'Soylent Green and Mad Cow Disease' captions you had to stomach last week.The Unmasked Revenger

Nope, doesn't look like there's a heartbeat there, maybe if I go a little lower. . .Kelvin Cabrera-Castellar

So, how long have you had this burning sensation when you urinate?jimkata

"There ya go...45 psi...you should be good for another 3,000 miles"Macavity

It worked! Jeffy, I've got a confession to make. That little injection that Dolly and I gave you last month wasn't vitamins. It was...well, first of all, let me tell you that you're going to be very famous.zed

Oh, man, this one is rumbling like Vesuvius! I'll turn off the lights, you get ready with the lighter.Diggit

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