DFC #70

(a cheery warmfuzzy cartoon that you can't see)

"Ah, sweet mystery of life, at last I've found you..."Capt. phealy

Don't let the brothers over in Jump Start see your Clan coloring book...They'll kick your cracker ass!DarkURTHE

"Oh ya, ghosts have it great. They don't go to school, they can fly, heck, you could even float into the girls showers. So why don't you just turn around, and I promise you won't feel a thing."Blake

"...the pronounced jaw, the occipital bun. A perfect example of Neandertal man.RLW

...and over there is the warehouse, where we're going to store all the "one-arm" captions for this cartoon.anon

Damn, you have an overbite now too! Conspiracy my ass, Matt Groening has taken over this strip!Mister Sinister

If there were any ghosts in your room, the monsters under your bed would have scared them off by now.Coyote

So Grandma's in the next room crying because you told her you had a new picture of Grampa? Good one, Jeffy!anon

No Jeffy, I can honestly say I really don't give a shit who Casper was before he died.RBByrnes

Naw, Gramps don't look like that now, by this time, he should be just ripe enough so that his eyeballs are bouncin' off the back of his skull, and most of the worms have made their way through the box and are enjoyin' an "old fart feast"...Orion the Hunter

Yeah, the CDA's dead, but I just don't know... the world may still not be ready for Semen Boy.Horselover Fat

So how come the ghost throws a better shadow than we do??paTRICK heSTER

OK, now that you have that spooked, glazed-over expression, put your finger out like this and mutter "...redrum...redrum..."ferret

Look! I can suck my thumb with my arm fully extended! What else but Thalidomide!?Bill Fortier

NO! Once again, I just look like her, to ease your transition into the afterlife. Now then. This is the Plane of Infinite Emptiness you read about in the orientation brochure. Over the next seven decades, your soul will be...anon.

JEFFY! Those are official crime scene photos! How is the DA gonna convict Daddy after you've colored in all of Gramma's chalk outlines?!?anon.

STROKE material! Stroke material, you idiot, not "ghost" material! Geez, you can't hear a damned thing!Don Spudleone

Y'know, the backgrounds around here just haven't been the same since Bil started reading Sartre.Capt. phealy

Hey! You got a copy of Pat Buchanan's autobiography! I wanna read it, I wanna read it!The Lawyer

Man, The New Yorker's covers sure have gone to crap ever since Tina Brown took over as editor...!anon.

If you think that's scary, take a look at Grandma in the shower.DMW

"Gaspar, the Personable Spirit? No, I think you're still on sticky legal turf there, Jeffy. Try something a little more vague."zede

Yes, it appeared that Jeffy had deactivated himself once again. Dolly activated her maintenance subroutine and extended her right manipulator, searching for the button that would release Jeffy's jaw mechanism and allow her to access the repair nodes of his positronic brain.zede

"It's okay, Jeffy...that's right...okay...now, nice and slowly, hand me the drawing of the ghost...come on...no-one's gonna hurt you...just give me the ghost picture...put it down...that's good..."Zed Factor Zero!

You mean you got a photo of that "NotMe" f**ker, and they still don't believe you?Kurt L.

It's called copyright infringement, Jeffy - and those Schmoo people will sue your ass off!Keef

Hey, send it in anyway! Look at the crap Cowles buys from dad!zazu

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