DFC Home Companion : A DFC Timeline

DFC #365
Sicily, June 8, 1909. Young Luca Brazzi suddenly experiences a terrifying, albeit cryptic, premonition of his future. --Desscribe

DFC #355
Hiroshima, Japan, December 7, 1942. Finally, a 'pull my finger' joke is destroyed before it can be released to terrorize the world. But at what cost? --kyosuke

DFC #387
August 13, 1949 - Young cartoonist Bil Keane's submission in the National Cancer Institute's $100 "Draw Us A Mascot" contest was Leukemia Boy (pictured), a bald, sickly youngster who, lacking the strength to move his arms, was forced to lap at his food like a dog. Not only did Keane not win first place, but he also got a letter from a young Dr. C. Everett Koop, which read "You heartless fucking turd!" --Smokey

DFC #460
November 14, 1952: 7-year-old Al Gore claims credit for the invention of ceiling fans, paper tablecloths, and twice-baked potatoes.--Sean Q

DFC #417
December 4, 1958: Jeffy suddenly enters puberty. --Helder

DFC #440
February 25, 1959: The Family Circus enters the Atomic Age when it detonates a small nuclear device over the offices of the Albuquerque Tribune. It would be 5 years before another newspaper dropped their strip. --Helder

DFC #444
March 18, 1959: The rivalry between Jeffy Keane and Ziggy comes to a head. --Helder

DFC #449
1960: As black racial humor becomes steadily more taboo in America, Bil Keane attempts to introduce some "lovable little yellow friends" to the Family Circus. Sino-American relations wouldn't stabilize again for 14 years.... --phil

DFC #363
February 11, 1964: Good job Mommy! Our act is perfect. Ed Sullivan's going to love us...I just hope those Beatle guys don't bore the audience to death before we go on... --Opie

DFC #379
August 28, 1964: Walt Disney sneaks on to the set, and departs content in the knowledge that Keane will pose no long-term threat to his empire. --Sean Q

DFC #385
September 30, 1965: Thel Keane fianlly beats out Blondie Bumstead as the most "Stacked" comic-strip mother. --Opie

DFC #470
September 28, 1969: Bil Keane enters the era of peace and love with the caption "Get a haircut, you freakin' hippie!"--Riff

DFC #401
Flashback: September 30, 1971. Thelma Keane supplies the Keane children with sugar-saturated foods and toys designed to encourage violence and mayhem. The five days of rioting that followed -- later to be known as the Keane Sugar Rush of '71 -- caused $1.4M in damages to neighborhood property and pets. --Helder

DFC #466
August 4, 1973: Barfy discovers that a semen-encrusted bedsheet is impenetrable to Jeffy's hypno-hair. August 5, 1973: Barfy becomes alpha male of the Keane clan after Jeffy's mysterious disappearance. August 8, 1973: Jeffy Keane's nude, lifeless body found in a shallow grave outside Scottsdale, Arizona.--crispy

DFC #463
Milestone: July 17, 1974. The rest of the office distracted, receptionist Kara Wurther becomes the first person to do an internet search for "lezbo action."--Bill

DFC #386
August 12, 1974 - King Features Syndicate employs an unsuccessful attempt to spawn merchandising revenues by marketing Family Circus as a "Dennis The Menace" style strip, with Billy as the "little stinker" character. As shown here in this picture on the prototype Burger King cup, Billy's catch phrase was to be "I'm a bad widdle cookie!" --Smokey

DFC #167
As the beam of heavenly light shown down on Bil and Thel, they relized, quite suddenly that none of the children looked a day older than they had on December 2nd, 1974, the date of the home movie. --Truant

DFC #415
December 1, 1985: Jeffy witnesses for the first time the marvel that is Erik Estrada's hair. --Helder

DFC #414
April 14, 1987: Bil Keane misreads his own notes and draws a melanin-headed kid --Ken

DFC #459
April 1, 1991: KDFC, the only radio station in town, launches its nonstop Terry Jacks marathon, vowing not to stop until every man, woman, and child in town calls in and requests the marathon's termination. 187 days later, after achieving national notoriety and dozens of threats from family and friends, the last holdout finally calls in.--Ken

DFC #287
July 7, 1994 - As contract negotiations with Jeffy continue to stall, Bil tries some creative editing to remove Jeffy from every scene of the "Chicago Holiday" series. --bobo

DFC #410
June 14th, 1995 -- Jeffy learns to dish out "whoopass". --Nethicus

DFC #226
On March 31st 1997, comic artist Bil Keane was finally driven over the edge by the combined tension of income tax evasion, quarrelling children, substance abuse, and a feeling of gross inferiority brought on by years of impotence. He raged through the neighborhood, hospitalizing dozens of well known comic characters, accounting for the "combined strips" of April 1st, 1997. His worst crimes involved doing unspeakable things to the dog Puddles from the Luann strip with a kitchen fork. Retaliation from Luann and her brother Brad have left Keane with permanent and embarassing disabilities. -- from The Sordid Truth Behind the Funny Pages, 1st Edition --Vice Pope Doug

DFC #211
July 4, 1997 -- the Mars Pathfinder touches down on the red planet, and immediately gets an image of the inhabitants. Hideous, humanoid, melon-headed creatures. After this one image, the probe unexpectedly self-destructs. The final data transmission reads: No intelligent life forms. --Ratman

DFC #459
May 21: Bob 'n Sheri make the grave error of choosing 'Unusual uses of household objects' as their call-in topic. The FCC took them off the air permanently after one call from Arizona.--Orrin Bloquy

DFC #381
February 18, 2031: Bil Keane works in a "gettin' jiggy wit' it" caption to demonstrate that he's tuned in to pop culture. --Lloyd Dobler